Tuesday, January 22, 2008


Just before I woke up I had a dream about a scuba diver who had to float around in the Artic Sea or some such place and cut icebergs with a chainsaw. A Great White Shark bit him and he had to fend it off with the chainsaw. Yes, I know there are no Great Whites in the Arctic, but my subconscious doesn't. It wasn't me in the dream, though, so it wasn't a bad dream. As Oscar Wilde says: "Arctic shark attacks are much funnier when they happen to other people." I am now 84th in our pool, thanks is large part to Nicklas Backstrom's--no, not Niklas Backstrom, Nicklas Backstrom!--8 assists in the last 2 games. Now, if only Maxim Afinogenov wasn't so terrible. But alas, terrible he is and terrible he will remain.

Today is weird: it's a full moon, Mom will arrive in Argentina, the Oscar nominees have been announced, and we'll maybe find out how 'official' the prospect of an American recession is (they had no trading yesterday because it was Lex Luther day. Sorry, I mean, Lex Luther Jr.). Normally I'm a lukewarm milktoast waffler about the Oscars, but this year there are some movies I really like in it. Juno and No Country for Old Men are both up for best picture. As much as I love Juno, I like No Country more. I hope Ellen Page wins for best actress, though; that would be an excellent coup ("Juno, like the city in Alaska" ... "No."). Javier Bardem has to has to win for best supporting actor, if for no other reason than that all the voters are afraid of the character he played. I also hope No Country wins for best director(s) and best cinematography. The other three up for best picture are Atonement, There Will Be Blood and Michael Clayton. I don't know what the last one is about. George Clooney is in it. I think he's like ... a teacher in an inner-city ghetto, and he coaches a basketball team ... and they go on to become national champions at Dance Dance Revolution. I want to see the other two still, There Will Be Blood is just fun to say. Use a deep, raspy voice, like you're possessed--but don't actually get possessed, that will lose you major style points. I have mixed feelings about Atonement: on one hand, it's one of my top three favourite novels and Ian McEwan (the author) had some significant amount of writing input on the film; on the other hand, I think more than the usual amount will be lost in the translation. Much of what is thematically profound in the novel depends on ... the written word and a blurring of fiction/reality that I don't think can translate to film very well. Hmmm. Well, I guess I'd have to see it to know if it is or isn't worked out.

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Monday, January 14, 2008

Can't we just like kick this old school. You know, like I stick the baby in a basket, send it your way, like Moses and the reeds?

Oh, hi, look, I'm alive. Welcome to two aught aught eight. Is that how you spell "aught"? I don't know, I'm writing in WordPad and it is spellcheckerless. For all I know, "spellcheckerless" might not even be a word, although I'm pretty sure it is. Hey, remember when ... holidays and stuff? Yeah, neat, huh? My mom donated a goat to a family in Africa on my behalf. I don't remember what country, maybe Togo. Maybe it's a Togolese goat now. Or maybe I just wanted to write "Togolese" because I don't think I've ever written it before--try it; it's fun, especially the 'ogo' part. Ogo ... ogo ... ... ... ogo. I wonder if it has a name now, and if the kids in the family pet it or stick things in its ears. That's probably not safe. Don't do that kids. Goats need to hear too. I also got some sweaters. My whole sweater hierarchy has been thrown into disorder. My formerly favourite sweater is all the way down to the number three spot. Oh, how very comfortable I am. Dress your family in corduroy and denim. Or at least corduroy and wool. Hey Kelly, McSweeney's was referenced in Juno, which is a special movie, by the way. It has the humour of Judd Apatow & co., but it's smarter and more moving. I teared up at the end. I mean, more than usual. You should see it. In other ... ogo ... I saw the Canucks play the Coyotes down in Vancouver last week with dad. It was fun to go, but we had bad luck because it was literally the first home game that Luongo has not started in the year-and-a-half he's been a Canuck. What are the odds? Probably something like 1 in 60, but I don't think odds go that high. Ogo. Yeah, err, umm, so I start my practicum in Febs. I are excited. It is now basically decided that I'll be teaching English 8, Social Studies 9 and .. English 10. Luckily I've been keeping up with my teenage popular culture for the last ... well, 15 years. Recently I've done this by playing Super Mario Galaxy and RockBand--whee! Whenever I play SMG I think, "this would be such a great game for kids" and then I think "wait, I'm not a kid" but then the bright shiny things start flashing again and I get distracted. Wait, what are we talking about? Oh, neat.

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